The year my mom's turkey caught fire and I saved Christmas with a pizza delivery

Two Thanksgivings ago we were at my aunt's house in Cleveland and my mom forgot to take the giblets out before putting the turkey in. Smoke started pouring out of the oven about 20 minutes in and my uncle tried to put it out with baking soda which just made it worse. I ran to my car and called Domino's for four large pizzas while everyone else stood in the yard coughing. We ended up having pizza and canned cranberry sauce on paper plates and honestly it was way less awkward than my aunt's usual political rants. Has anyone else had a holiday meal plan totally fall apart and have to just order takeout?

3 comments

3 Comments

lisa52mo ago

Wait so did your aunt ever get upset about the pizza replacing her traditional meal? @paige427 I feel like the dog getting the ham is almost a blessing in disguise if it saved everyone from awkward small talk. My cousin tried to salvage her burnt turkey one year by drowning it in gravy and pretending it was fine, and let's just say the food poisoning was real. Pizza is seriously the ultimate backup plan for any holiday disaster because it's cheap, fast, and nobody can argue about toppings. I bet your Domino's driver still tells that story to his coworkers about the lady in the pajama robe haha. Honestly the canned cranberry sauce on paper plates thing is kind of a vibe, way less cleanup than a formal dinner.

logan2051mo ago

...and honestly the canned cranberry sauce on paper plates sounds like a power move honestly. my brother once "forgot" to defrost the ham for Easter so we ended up having cold cuts from the deli and a bag of Hawaiian rolls on the floor because he also "forgot" to set up the table. the deli meat was actually better than that dry spiral ham he usually makes so it worked out.

paige4272mo ago

called Domino's for four large pizzas" - honestly that's iconic. One time I ordered Chinese food for Christmas Eve because the ham somehow ended up in the dog's reach and we had to toss it. The delivery driver looked so confused when I tipped him extra and told him Merry Christmas through my pajama robe. Still better than eating something questionable just to be polite.