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Used to have a 12 point checklist before a date, now I just ask one thing
Back in 2021 I had this whole system, I would look at her profile for like 40 minutes, plan three conversation topics, pick a spot near my place in Denver so I could bail easy. Last month a girl showed up 35 minutes late to a brewery on South Broadway and spent the whole time on her phone, and I just sat there thinking about how much prep I wasted. So now I skip all that. I ask one question before we meet, what are you actually looking for, and if the answer is vague I stay home and watch basketball. Has anyone else cut way back on the pre date stuff and felt better for it?
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alice_kim11d ago
Stopped doing homework for dates too, feels like we're all just tired of pretending.
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julia_patel11d ago
Spent years crafting the perfect first message like I was writing a term paper nobody asked for. Now my opener is basically hey what's up and if that doesn't land, oh well. @alice_kim you're right that we're all tired of the act, it takes way too much energy to keep up a fake version of yourself just to get a second date. The pretending part was never the fun part anyway, it was just the price we thought we had to pay. Turns out nobody actually enjoys the homework, we were all just doing it because we thought everyone else was.
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