Why does nobody teach you how to handle the check split

I used to think splitting the check 50/50 was always the right move until a date at The Rusty Nail in Austin where she ordered the $45 steak and I got a $12 burger. She insisted on going halves and I just agreed because I didn't want to be awkward, but it bugged me for days. Now I always ask the server for separate checks up front or at least say "I'll grab mine" before anyone orders. Has anyone else figured out a smooth way to handle this without making it weird?

3 comments

3 Comments

the_max26d ago

$45 steak and a $12 burger, you say, but were you not sitting there enjoying her company too? The whole point of a date is to have a shared experience, not to nickel and dime the menu after the fact. If you agreed to go halves, that was the deal you made in the moment, and she probably figured you were fine with it. Splitting 50/50 is a simple, clean way to end a meal, and making a big production over separate checks can kill the mood faster than any overpriced steak. Next time, maybe pick a place where the most expensive thing on the menu is still within your comfort zone, or just speak up before the first bite instead of letting resentment simmer.

benc5326d ago

Read an article recently that was saying how this whole dynamic goes back to outdated expectations around dating and money. The author pointed out that if you can't afford to treat your date to whatever they want, you shouldn't be going to a place where the check can get that lopsided in the first place. I mean, it makes sense to me, a $45 steak is a big swing compared to a $12 burger, and on a split check, thats not really fair. Next time, just pick a spot with burgers for both of you, or be real about it from the start.

taylor_hayes2521d ago

Wait, is that really a thing though... people suggesting you shouldn't go somewhere if you can't afford to cover whatever they order? I feel like that kinda misses the point of splitting things evenly. If you agree to go halves, you're both saying you're okay with paying for half of whatever comes out, not just half of what you ordered. The $45 steak thing only becomes a problem if she's ordering it knowing you're stuck with part of it... but if you both agreed to split the whole bill, that's on you for not speaking up beforehand.