Stopped making eye contact with men on the subway after that one incident

Was riding the F train in Brooklyn last Tuesday and a guy followed me off at my stop because I smiled at him. Now I just stare at my phone or the floor the whole ride. Anyone else have to change their whole commute routine like this?

3 comments

3 Comments

danielhenderson25d ago

My friend Jen had a guy on the R train actually reach out and tap her shoulder after she glanced up from her book for half a second. She literally stopped reading on the train completely, just airpods in and staring at the subway map above the doors the whole ride now. @samwalker is right about how draining that mean mugging can be, Jen tried that for like two weeks and said her jaw was sore from clenching it the whole time. She told me the worst part was this one morning she accidentally made eye contact with a little kid and the mom gave her this dirty look like she was the scary one on the train. Now she just sits there with her eyes closed like she's sleeping even if she's wide awake.

samwalker25d ago

That whole "mean mugging" approach your friend uses might work for her but it just makes me feel worse honestly. Putting on that hard act all ride drains me more than just looking down and keeping to myself. The real problem isn't how we look at these guys, it's that they feel entitled to bother us in the first place. Is pretending to be tough really winning if we're still the ones having to change our whole vibe just to ride the train?

margaret9925d ago

Did your friend actually just give up and stop making eye contact too? My coworker Sara had the same thing happen on the L train and she went full opposite direction - now she walks around with the meanest resting bitch face you've ever seen, earbuds in, looking straight ahead like she's about to fight someone. She told me it works way better than hiding because the creeps leave her alone faster. I've been trying it myself and honestly it's exhausting but at least nobody follows me off the train anymore.