Used to fake a smile at every church potluck, now I just say no thanks and sit in the parking lot
For about 6 years I went to every single potluck at my wife's church in Modesto and ate whatever was handed to me, even the tuna casserole that made me gag, because leaving early felt rude. Six months ago I started telling people flat out that I don't do potlucks, and now I just sit in my truck in the lot until she's done. Three people have asked if I'm okay, and one lady keeps leaving plates on my hood.
Six years of tuna casserole is a long time to do something you hate just to be polite, so I get why you stopped. But sitting in the truck in the parking lot every single time seems like a lot of trouble to avoid a potluck. If the church stuff really bugs you that much, why not just stay home and let your wife go on her own? The lady leaving plates on your hood is basically telling you that you look sad out there. A guy eating cold green bean casserole alone in a truck does not exactly scream "I'm fine.