That joke about my neighbor's new fence cost me $150 in peace offerings

I thought it would be funny to say 'Looks like you're building a wall, not a fence' when my retired neighbor started putting up privacy fencing last spring. The guy had just finished six months of chemo and wanted some quiet backyard privacy. He didn't laugh at all and just walked inside without a word. I ended up taking over a $150 fruit basket from the local market and a handwritten apology to smooth things over. Has anyone else had a simple joke backfire that badly with someone you see every day?

2 comments

2 Comments

milaprice1mo ago

My neighbor did something similar a few years back and I used to think he was being too sensitive until I realized he had just lost his wife. A joke about his new garden shed landing in the wrong spot made me feel pretty small when I found out she had planned it before she passed. It changed my whole view on assuming what someone can or cannot take a joke about.

parker_park81mo ago

Best thing you can do is just not joke about anything personal unless you know the person well. People carry stuff you cant see, and the cost of being wrong is way higher than the benefit of being right. Give people space to react however they need to.