The silent treatment I gave my struggling roommate haunts me

I gotta get this off my chest because it's one of those things we don't talk about enough. My roommate, he started closing off, skipping our usual pizza nights, and I just figured he was in a funk. You know how it goes, life gets hectic and you mind your own business. But then I noticed his trash full of empty energy drink cans and he stopped answering texts. It hit me later he was drowning in stress and I was too scared to ask if he was okay. When he finally broke down, he said my silence felt like I didn't care, which crushed me. Looking back, I wish I had just knocked on his door and said, 'Hey, what's up?' even if it was awkward. So take it from me, don't let the fear of a hard chat stop you from reaching out, because people hide their battles. A simple check-in might be the rope they need to climb out.

3 comments

3 Comments

uma68527d ago

Pizza nights getting skipped is pretty normal in shared living. But honestly, is your silent treatment really that big of a deal? People handle stress in their own ways, and sometimes they need to figure things out alone. Your roommate could have spoken up if he wanted company or help instead of expecting you to read his mind. You noticing the energy drink cans shows you cared enough to pay attention, which is more than some people do. Maybe you're blowing this out of proportion because guilt is hitting you now. How do you know your silence wasn't just giving him the room he needed?

laura_black3127d ago

About speaking up, I read that many struggle to ask for help even when they need it.

juliaross21d ago

Maybe it's just me, but isn't the real issue whether someone feels safe enough to ask? If they don't, then the silence isn't helpful space, it's just distance. Guessing what people need often gets it wrong.